With Just A Hint Of Mayhem

Music trivia, useless info, extra added random stuff and the odd rant from me

“Turn and face the strange” February 16, 2016


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By now most of you will, I am sure, have seen Lady Gaga performing her David Bowie tribute at the Grammy Awards ceremony. Based upon the noise from Bowie fans online it seems to have divided opinions. From those suggesting that it was truly sublime to some deluded souls saying that they wanted to tear Gaga’s eyes out. Frankly the latter option is plainly stupid and those with that view need some urgent therapy!

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I like Gaga’s music but having seen her play live a few years ago I felt that she takes pretentiousness to previously uncharted levels. However  I thought her Bowie medley at the Grammy’s was a truly wonderful and fitting tribute to the Dame. Her singing was spot on, the light effects on her face at the start was splendid; dripping paint, spiders and that iconic lightning flash all made an appearance. The band, which included Nile Rogers was perfect. Just think how many of Gaga’s army of Little Monsters might now become a new generation of Bowie fans as a result of this soon to be classic performance. I would love to hear what your  opinion of Gaga does Bowie is. Will the forthcoming tribute to David Bowie at the Brit Awards be better than this? Somehow I doubt it.

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Brit Awards 2014 – Wednesday February 19th 2014 February 19, 2014


brits 2014The Brits has kicked off well with a storming “R U Mine” from those Sheffield scallywags the Arctic Monkeys. Will it all go downhill from here? Let’s find out shall we? Well at least James Corden was finally on fire for the first time hosting this show. Well the sleeve of his jacket was to set up a lame joke about the Arctic Monkey‘s pyrotechnics. Thankfully this will be his last Brits. The British Female Brit award was presented the shortest man in music Prince Rogers Nelson accompanied by his new band. Corden interrupted for a selfie with the purple one. Ellie Goulding won it and given the nominees deservedly so in my opinion. She was somewhat awed by meeting Prince too.

Katy Perry was next on stage and she went a bit Stargate Cleopatra on us. She sang “Dark Horse” from her new album ‘Prism’. I presume it’s not a George Harrison tribute. Kylie and Pharrell Williams presented the International Male solo Artist award after more inane and unfunny shite from Corden. It was won by Bruno Mars; personally I expected it to go to Justin Timberlake although I would have voted for Eminem.

Tinie Tempah and Fearne Cotton rocked up to present the British Breakthrough Act Award. It was well won by the rather excellent Bastille. I love the ‘Bad Blood’ album. Sadly Corden was back after that with a dreadful interview with One Direction which included some pathetic jokes about Justin Bieber in prison. Then we were subjected to Bruno Mars with “Treasure”. But to be fair I judged him too soon, that was a good performance. Really classy modern R & B.

Next up a welcome return from Lily Allen to present the award for Best British Group. Thank fuck it wasn’t won by Wand Erection. It went to a proper band instead. The marvellous Arctic Monkeys. The previously known winner of the newcomer award was the understated but talented Sam Smith.

Now we have the Global Success Award presented by Rosie double-barreled surname. Who the fuck is she? Was this Award manufactured for the ultimate manufactured band One Direction? Can’t we just sell them to the USA? Is Harry Styles having a wee the most controversial act of this years show? Sadly it probably is. The revolution doesn’t start here!

Beyonce live, now that was bloody good in my opinion. But was she lip syncing “XO”? The nest award was for best British single, presented by Katy Perry. Was she trying an English accent? Won by the fabulous Rudimental which thankfully beat Olly Murs and Wand Erection.

The first collaboration of this years show was Disclosure and Lorde with a really cool and funky take on Lorde’s “Royals”. Followed by a brilliant live rendition of “White Noise” with Aluna. The International Group award was presented by Cesc Fabregas (WTF?) and Nicole Scherzinger. The winners were Daft Punk. Could it really have been anyone else? The legend that is Nile Rodgers collected the award on their behalf.

Ellie Goulding was next to perform. She did “I Need Your Love” and “Burn”. I loved the massed percussion during “Burn”. I have really grown to like Ellie’s music. Noel Gallagher was there to present the best male solo artist award. Let’s hope he has a new album out soon. Fuck me Bowie’s only gone and won it! Kate Moss accepted it on Bowie’s behalf at his personal behest. A brilliant speech written by the Dame too. This has made my night!

Nick Grimshaw that bloke from Radio One who is moderately more talented than Chris Moyles stepped up to present the International Female solo artist award. Lorde was the winner and a bloody good choice too.  Bowie is a Lorde fan. Then we had yet another shite interview by Corden with Nile Rodgers and Pharrell Williams. The British Video award was voted for live on Twitter during the show and was presented by Jimmy Carr. Sadly it was won by Wand Erection with “Best Song Ever”, but it isn’t is it?

Rudimental and Bastille combined on stage to become Bastimental for the night. It certainly made up for a second 1D award for the night. Blimey just how sexy is Ella Eyre? Now we are onto the final award of the night, it’s the one that everyone wants. It’s best album and it was presented by Emilie Sande. It went to the Arctic Monkeys. It is a great album, but I was hoping for a second Brit of the night for David Robert Jones. But well done to Alex and the boys, although their acceptance speech was largely bollocks wasn’t it?

The show was closed by Pharrell Williams and Nile Rodgers. What a barnstorming performance from two music masters. “Get Lucky”, “Good Times”, “Happy” the hits just kept coming. Overall I think this years show was an improvement on last year. Some marks out of ten from me; James Corden 1/10, Bowie winning a Brit 10/10 and for the overall show 5/10 could do better.

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“You could be the DJ I could be the dance floor” April 24, 2013


JLSasaurus now extinct....... WOOOO HOOO!

JLSasaurus now extinct……. WOOOO HOOO!

It is with obvious regret and sadness that I have to announce the appalling news that JLS will be breaking up. I would also like to ask is that first sentence true? Well technically the bit about JLS breaking up was, but the obvious regret and sadness was in fact complete bollocks. My only sadness is that this didn’t happen so much sooner. How did we manage to give these useless pop muppets the oxygen of publicity for nearly five years! They arrived via a TV show which is less tasteful than the sulphur discharge from Satan‘s hemorrhoids; that’ll be the X Factor. They didn’t even finish first, that was the equally short on talent Alexandra Burke.

Someone stole all the toilets and toilet doors so JLS were left squatting and unable to go.....is that why they are full of shit?

Someone stole all the toilets and toilet doors so JLS were left squatting and unable to go…..is that why they are full of shit?

In five years they have clearly wrung their teenage audience dry (well technically they have drained the coffers of the parents of their teenage audience); four albums and five UK number one singles? What has the world come to? As if Westlife were not bad enough these boys have taken the worst of them and added a dance beat and more stage dancing. so goodbye to Oritse Williams, Marvin Humes, J.B. Gill and Aston Merrygold. I would love to say I’ll miss you, but that would be a lie. But I guess the ensuing solo albums might be so bad that they’ll be good for a laugh. One will do an album of German oompah style covers of the Dead Kennedy’s back catalogue, another will spit out a concept album about how My Little Pony‘s are made and the other two will collaborate on a re-recording of everything JLS have ever recorded using only flatulence and water! But obviously being the superstars that they are they couldn’t just break up and go away, they have to do the obligatory farewell tour, which has been very imaginatively titled ‘Goodbye; The Greatest Hits Tour’ which as you have probably guessed will be in support of the album ‘Goodbye: The Greatest Hits’. So clearly not a cynical cash in is it? Then there will be the reunion tour in 2023 to look forward to.

By the end of next year our fan base will be about as big as this!

By the end of next year our fan base will be about as big as this!

Finally and just to add a degree of balance I have included a video of one of their UK number ones just in case any of their obviously distraught fans has arrived here by mistake!

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“Some specials and rat food, get lost in the crowd” February 16, 2013


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I think I am seriously ill, I must be, otherwise why would I like this years official single recorded for Comic Relief? It’s a great cover version of Blondie’s “One Way Or Another” with a few lines of the Undertones‘ “Teenage Kicks” thrown in for free. Why would liking this make me think I am seriously ill I can hear you shout. “WHY DOES LIKING THIS COVER OF BLONDIE’S ONE WAY OR ANOTHER MAKE YOU THINK YOU’RE SERIOUSLY ILL?” (that was you shouting by the way).

Good advice from Debbie for when you have a Wand Erection

Good advice from Debbie for when you have a Wand Erection

Well I am sad to say that the act that has covered it is none other than those X Factor Pop Muppets One Direction or Wand Erection as I now prefer to call them. Their version doesn’t come close to surpassing the original, but it is far better than I would have expected and more importantly it is for a good cause. Click here to make your donation for Red Nose Day 2013. It is released on Sunday 17th February and they will be performing it at the Brits this Wednesday. Enjoy both versions of the song while I go and lie down for a restful nap and hopefully to recover from this abominable blight on my previously great music taste!

 

“They think they’ll get to heaven through the universe” – Brit Awards 2011 February 15, 2011


So this years Brits have undergone yet another revamp and moved to the O2 Arena as well. It is now designed to build up to a finale of the announcement of the Best British Album, with each nominee introducing their album in little vignettes throughout the show. I guess it’s based around the Oscars where the whole spectacle concludes with the Best Film Awards. Even the actual award has had a makeover too, thanks to Vivienne Westwood. With Viv involved it seems weird that the Brits effectively started at the height of punk and it was all black ties and very formal and Cliff Richard was the winner of Best British Male Vocalist, oh how times have changed, well mostly anyway.

The show was kicked off by Take That with “Kidz”. I hate to say it but even with Robbie back in the ranks I quite like them. The performance was good and the boys were surrounded by riot police dancers who stripped at the end. Maybe there’s a lesson for the police the next time they are called out to student protests. But did anyone else think that a couple of the ‘That were wearing incontinence pants?

Hosted by James Corden, personally I’m not sure about that choice I have never really found him either funny or exciting. First award was for Best British Male presented by Dizzee Rascal, last years winner, to Plan B. Now that was a good choice, the ‘Defamation Of Strickland Banks’ is a killer album.

Another live performance came next, it was the abundantly talented Adele, boy that girl has got a superb voice. She sang “Someone Like You” accompanied just by a pianist. It’s hard to believe that she is so young. Now that’s what you call real singing, are you listening Cheryl Cole? It was a brilliant example of how talented a lone singer can be, but did they have to shower her with all that silver snow/ confetti?

Now that interlude of James Corden speaking to Justin Bieber was weird. James telling Justin how wonderful he smelled. Is that grooming? (Yes I know you could read that two ways!) It was left to Fearne Cotton presenting the Best British Breakthrough Artist award to take that awful scene out of my mind. The winner was Tinie Tempah, apparently Prince Harry and Prince William are fans!

International Album was presented by none other than German Musical Superstar………..errrr Boris Becker. Anyone for Tennis? It was justly won by Arcade Fire with ‘The Suburbs’. They gave a fantastic name check to British acts; Clash, Bowie, Culture Club, New Order, Depeche Mode.

And now we have Rihanna who started her medley set from behind what could have been a giant shower curtain or giant grass skirt. The hair matched the dress, but did the collar match the cuffs? 😉 We came close to finding out as she removed the dress pretty damned quickly! Maybe not everything but the kitchen sink, but Burundi style drummers and wait……. was that the Olympic flame? Oh and another thing, now that’s what you call real dancing, are you watching Cheryl Cole?

Mark Ronson was there to present the Critics Choice Award, was he dressed like an Accountant or was it just me? I don’t mean that I was dressed like an Accountant, obviously! Don’t you think his hair was like a ski slope? Well even more obviously no surprise that the winner was Jessie J, as this was one of the awards that was announced some while in advance of the ceremony itself. The fourth woman to win that award and she didn’t blub….. but only just!

One of the nominees for best album were the next band on stage, it was Mumford And Sons. It’s no wonder they’re so big in America is it? They look like hicks and hillbillies; mind you they were bloody good at the Reading Festival last year. Who wears cowboy hats or truckers caps in this country, which just puts my flat cap to shame really!

To present the International Male Award we had yet another musical superstar; Lewis Hamilton…..errrr how many albums has he had then? The award gave Cee Lo Green his first ever Brit. Now that’s a big “Fuck You” to all the previous voters, they won’t “Forget You” next time Cee Lo. A brilliant choice in my opinion. He gave a great shout to Boy George too. Nice to see all the Johnny Foreigners thanking the Brits this time around. I’m not xenophobic ok, I’m just an archetypal arrogant Brit! Well actually I’m not really, I am a Brit but I don’t think I’m arrogant or even archetypal, although I’m sure some might disagree!

What was the Best British Single then, it was presented by Alan Carr, is it me or does his voice really grate on you? It was also voted for by fans, so that should mean a good choice right? Well it was a good choice, it was Tinie Tempah with “Pass Out” It could have been so much worse with all those X Factor related nominees.

What the F*ck am I doing here?

Two blokes off of Duran Duran presented the Best International Group award to the magnificent Arcade Fire. What can one say? Flipping heck another good choice, this revamp has done wonders for giving the right people the awards too.

Plan B was the next live performer. Show stopping set and dancing, a tight band. It was like a modern version of the old Motown or Stax Revues. Were those Police left over from the Take That performance? Of course they were, the Riot Squad were there again. It’s one thing infiltrating eco-activists, but this level of police intrusion is so far beyond subtle it’s off the bloody scale! What about the dude that was set aflame? Was that a tribute to the recently deceased Johnny Storm aka the Human Torch off of the Fantastic Four? Check out issue number 587 of the World’s Greatest Comic magazine for more info on that one people!

Avril Lavigne and Will Young combined to present the next award, now that is a novel but strange pairing. It was International Breakthrough Act and was won by Justin Bieber, well I suppose it couldn’t all go my way could it. Still at least it wasn’t the Glee Cast was it? Still the boy done good bearing in mind he is not quite seventeen yet.

Best British Female Solo award was present by Georg O’Dowd aka Boy George, isn’t it about time he upgraded to Man George? Deservedly won by the beautiful talent that is Laura Marling. She was followed by a brilliant performance from Arcade Fire with “Ready To Start”. Are these guys one of the best bands on the planet right now? I think so and it always looks like they’re really enjoying themselves too.

Now that’s what I call presenting an award, are you watching Cheryl Cole? Ooops no you’re not, you’re actually presenting the damned thing for Best International Female. It went to Cheryl’s ‘Girl Crush’ (hmmmm interesting in a pervy kind of way); Rihanna in a big white dress with roses….. they grow on you!

Tinie Tempah took to the stage next and frankly he did it like he owned the thing. Great performance and bloody good laser show to boot. The stage was full of Tinie lookalikes, how about a spoofed version of Eminem, anyone for ‘The Real Tinie Tempah’? This dude is a really top bloke in my humble opinion. Move over Mr Rascal and make way for Mr Tempah. Are the organisers of the Reading Festival watching? How about Tinie Tempah on the afternoon bill on the Main Stage Saturday or Sunday, it’s worked well for Dizzee before hasn’t it?

Dermot O’Leary off of the X Factor (amongst Others) no less was on hand to present the Award for Best British Group. It went to Take That. It pains me to say that with their current album I actually like some music that Robbie is involved in. I must be ill in the head. Robbie was his usual nonsensical arse with just a couple of shouts of ‘Shabba’ thankfully leaving the other boys to do most of the talking and thanking.

So then came the grand finale the Best British Album Award, presented by Rock God Roger Daltrey off of the Who. He said that he thought that Plan B’s set had made him reminisce of the early days of the Who,(was he serious?) but sadly the award didn’t go to him, it went to Mumford And Sons, still not a bad choice.

The show was closed by the mighty, magnificent Cee Lo Green with “Forget You”. A great tune but I kind of wish he had done the original ‘naughty’ version! A great singer none the less. So that is as they say it for this years Brits. I will be back with other posts before the 2012 Brits so feel free to keep reading my blog now that you’ve found you’re way here. I bet you’re relieved that I have got to the end of a whole post with no mention of Lady Gaga……….DOH!

The good, the bad and the untalented!

 

“My mama told me when I was young, we are all born superstars” February 14, 2011


So on the eve of the Brit Awards let’s have a quick run down on how us Brits fared at the Grammys;

Jeff Beck – Best pop instrumental performance and best rock instrumental performance.

Paul McCartney – best solo rock vocal performance for his live album Good Evening New York City.

Beatles Box Set – Best historical album.

La Roux – Best electronic/dance album.

Iron Maiden – Best metal performance.

Sade – Best R&B performance by a duo or group with vocals.

Muse – Best rock album (The Resistance).

In addition to that lot Sir Michael Jagger gave his first ever performance at the Grammys with a brilliant cover of Solomon Burke‘s “Everybody Needs Somebody”

But as usual for these events Lady Gaga upstaged everyone. No meat dress this time but she was carried along the red carpet and onto the stage inside a giant egg. She performed her new single “Born This Way”. No Spinal Tap moment in the egg either, unlike U2 who were once stuck inside a giant lemon before they could get onto the stage!

Check out the Grammys info by clicking here and for the Brit Awards page click here.

I will, hopefully, be back tomorrow to give you my take on the 2011 Brit Awards!

 

Brits Special “I’m On The Right Track, Yeah I’m On To A Winner” February 17, 2010


It’s February 2010 (the 16th to be precise) and ‘With just A Hint Of Mayhem’ is coming to you live from the Brit Awards 2010. Well ok almost live and actually not really there but just in front of the telly! Just like last year really, if you want to relive my post from last years Brits click here

This years awards were hosted by the rather spiffingly talented Mr Peter Kay (Garlic Bread?) Interestingly the ad breaks featured a Master Card advert which was the story of last years Outstanding Achievement award winners the Pet Shop Boys doing a concert at someone’s house! Who would you choose to do a gig at your house? I would opt for David Bowie or Kate Bush!

First up to perform was the delectable Lily Allen. She sang “The Fear” with quite a strange cast of dancers; Pram Pushers, Men in Bowler Hats, Suits with no trousers and Union Jack Boxer Shorts and also some Umbrella Parachutists (is that a word?) dressed in pink camouflage gear. truly spectacular indeed! Lily was wearing a black hot pants type outfit, which I rather liked but Catwoman definitely didn’t! Hmmmmmmm I wonder why?

The first award was presented by Page 3 and ‘I’m A Celebrity’ veteran Sam Fox. She was introduced by Peter Kay as Sam Fleetwood, Mick Fox, Sam Fox in reference to the debacle that was the Brits presented by Sam and Mick Fleetwood off of Fleetwood Mac in the late 1980s. She presented the Brits Memorable Performance of the last 30 years. It seemed we were expecting a list of nominees, but there didn’t appear to be one. The award was given to the Spice Girls and was collected by Scary and Ginger or Mel B and Geri Halliwell as they prefer to be known these days

The next award was for Best British Male Artist and was presented by Andy Serkis who played Gollum in Lord Of The Rings and most recently played Ian Dury. The award went to the hugely entertaining Dizzee Rascal, thank god it wasn’t Robbie Williams! After this we endured JLS performing “Beat Again” they arrived on stage on strings, which confirmed my suspicions that these pop muppets are indeed puppets!

Mel B returned to the stage to present the next award to Jay Z or Jason Zed as Peter Kay called him. He won Best International Male Solo Artist. He spoke of his Glastonbury appearance and mentioned (tongue in cheek methinks) how he was influenced by the Spice Girls.

Noddy Holder off of Slade presented the best album of 30 years of the Brits award to Liam Gallagher for the Oasis album What’s The Story Morning Glory. Obviously Liam swore because the sound disappeared and the ‘audio has been muted’ appeared in the corner of the screen. As he left the stage he threw the microphone into the crowd and allegedly also threw the award into the crowd as well. Peter Kay referred to him, rightly so, as a knobhead when he did leave the stage.

Kasabian then played live and for me they were somewhat lacklustre, what did you think. I thought the flames at the front of the stage were more exciting.

The next award, the Breakthrough Act, was presented by Geri Halliwell (was this a Spice Girls take over?). Geri had to apologise for her earlier failure with Mel B to thank the other Spice Girls! It went to, shamefully in my opinion JLS. Pixie Lott, La Roux and Friendly Fires were all also nominated and missed out to the aforementioned muppets!

Courtney Love presented the Critics Choice Award to the delightful Ellie Goulding, I think I may have to download her album very soon.

Next to perform was the fantastic Lady Ga Ga. In my opinion she is a true star and a real mold breaker. She wore a kind of lace mask, fright wig and a body stocking that seemed to reveal more than it covered. A great performance and someone I would love to see in concert. She also dedicated her first song to the late, great and sadly departed Alexander McQueen.

Idris Elba off of London’s Burning (who he?) presented the Best British Group Award to Kasabian. Personally I felt it should have gone to Muse. Incidentally up to this point I had guessed every winner correctly!

Cat Deeley presented the first of Lady GaGa’s awards for International Breakthrough Artist. This was followed by a fantastic and inspired duet from Dizzee Rascal and Florence off of Florence and the Machine. It was the classic and one of my all time favourite songs; “You Got The Love” which was originally by the Source featuring Candi Staton.

There followed a short film clip of Prince Harry extolling the virtues and wonderful charitable work of the Brits Trust. He came across as quite amusing and very human and showed that one is down wiv da kidz! Which coming from someone like me who is very anti royal is big praise indeed.

über Knobhead Jonathan Ross presented the Best International Female award to (no surprises here) Lady GaGa. her second of the night so far!

Dame Shirley Bassey presented the Solo British Female award, one which she herself actually won in 1977. It went to one of my current favourite singers, Lily Allen. Lily wore a red wig, which she claimed was to make it hard for the cameras to pick her out for that ‘disappointed’ shot had she not won. Incidentally she clearly seemed surprised and very giggly!

Jay Z and Alicia Keys then duetted on a storming “New York State Of Mind”. Mr Z is my second favourite rapper after Eminem and Alicia possess one of the finest soul voices of her generation.

Mika presented the Best International Album Award to Lady GaGa, her third and final Brit of the night. I believe the new Queen Of The Brits deserved every one of them!

Cheryl Cole then performed “Fight For Your Love” amidst a cast of a thousand dancers. For me the dark glasses and dance moves suggested our Cheryl is something af a Janet Jackson wannabe. I didn’t spot Cashley in the crowd though, perhaps he texted her earlier!

Alan Carr had the honour of giving the Best British Single Award to JLS, well that one was voted for by Sun readers so what do you expect?

Tom Ford (is he a fashion designer?) presented the Best British Album Brit to Florence and the Machine for the brilliant album ‘Lungs’. Florence gave a very gracious acceptance speech. ‘Lungs’ is one of my favourite albums of recent years I also loved her set at last years Reading Festival

Finally the winner of the Outstanding Achievement Award who also had the honour of closing the show was Robbie Bloody Williams. He performed a medley of hits, including a song which I really do not like, “Angels” As regular readers might have guessed the appearance of Robbie was definitely not a highlight for me.

So in summary 3 Brits to Lady GaGa and sadly 2 to JLS and in my opinion that is 2 too many!

 To finish here are a few Brit News links for you;

Sky News

The Guardian

 

 
ACCREDITED SENIOR PSYCHOTHERAPIST,COUNSELLOR, CBT THERAPIST AND COMEDY WRITER -Dr.Fawzy Masaoud-LONDON, ENGLAND

NO DESPAIR WITH LIFE AND NO LIFE WITH DESPAIR . Email: dr.fawzyclinic2019@yahoo.com

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